Surprise Vomits

I’ve been sick for about a week, and I’ve come to an exciting conclusion regarding vomits:

The surprise vomits are the worst kind of vomits.

Normally you get a few seconds warning. You can feel it coming. You get to prepare.

Not with surprise vomits, yo. You get two coughs. Two normal coughs. The third cough, you get orange juice vomits in your beard.

And that’s just not cool, man. That’s just not cool.